Overseas will always be my dream.

Alhamdulillah..

I have been here for almost one and the half years.
Few months to go to leave New Zealand insyaAllah.. waaaa..
I feel so scared to go back to Malaysia. Im so scared to confront with the reality that I have to be an English teacher soon. Feel scared to start working as a teacher in a big school, to start struggling to be a better Mutarabbi and Murabbi. oh. pheeww~ Can I do that at the same time?

Sometimes, I was thinking that it would be better for me to be a fulltime housewife once I get married. huhu
What laa..huhuhuhu.. At first, my mind has concluded that it would be better for me to be a full housewife as I would have plenty of time to take care of my family. The reason of me saying this is because I know, being a teacher is not easy at this present time. I strongly believe that the work loads and the burden carried by a teacher in this challenging era is not simple and easy. Since a teacher should have to be at school longer than at home, Im afraid if  I couldnt concentrate on my family well. Okay, I sound 'jumud' and close-minded to assume matters like this.
I have to realize in whatever situation pun, susah ke, senang ke jadi cikgu, it actually depends on each of the individual if they want to make a thing become real or not. It doesnt matter if we are an ordinary teacher or engineer at UTP or even an accountant at Bank Negara, the scaredness of giving less quality of attention towards our family should not have been aroused although I bet it would sometimes affect us to some aspects. Dengan tu, the best way to change those lousy assumptions and excuses is by managing our daily schedule dengan baik dan lebih baik. The thing that I have learnt since I started growing as a wiser women is, DO NOT blame others if I myself cannot play my role successfully or effectively.
Indeed, I have just to admit that everything in this world is not easy. Even if I want to take my bath (example) pun kadang2 susah,  ni kan pula pasal career. hohoho..

To people out there as well as me, please don't start saying that we cannot make hard things up, because that is the reason why the word of 'TRY' and 'NEVER GIVE UP' are created.

p/s : To be a better person than yesterday is not always easy because Allah wants to see how far we can go to overcome the test that has been given by Him. *peace* fight toooo ooo !